No longer will your girlfriend call you spineless when bullied by men twice your size. And if she does, she’s full of shit. Especially if you’re wearing this Vertebrae Belt. That’s two whole spines. How many does that bitch want? Pretty sure she needs to date a skeleton for a while, considering how much she talks about bones, of every ...
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Jaws XXX: Man Shark Turns Your Peeper Into a Predator
Vaginas aren’t the only genitals that can grow teeth. Watch out ladies, my penis is very hungry. Hope you’re not bleeding! Sharks can sense that you know. The Man Shark is basically a cock-ring with jagged (albeit, gentle) teeth, creating the illusion of the dreaded cockious sharkus. If you want to scare off almost any girl, this is a perfect ...
Read More »My Little Zombie Pony Will Eat Your Brain and Devour Your Soul
My Little Zombie Pony uses her saccharine cutesy-ness to distract you just long enough for you not to realize she is feasting on your brain. BRAAAAINNNNS! Or is it bray-ns? If Crystal’s Pony Tale ever merged with Resident Evil, it would look something like this.
Read More »Postino – The iPhone Postcard App
As I read a review of Postino, a smirk appeared on my face. This is exactly the kind of killer app I love to discover. You head over to the App Store and download the Postino 1.0 app for free. Then, you pick a photo you took and add a frame, text and whatever doo-dads you please. Next, you can ...
Read More »Fashionable Varicose Veins
I actually know a guy who’s legs look like this, but never mind that. You don’t care about someone who lives with varicose veins. You want your own and you want them now! These stockings will do the trick but be prepared to plunk down a whopping $65. I mean, sure they’re artsy, detailed and not mass produced but $65 ...
Read More »One-Stop iPhone 3rd Generation Rumor Round-Up Chart
TGR created this awesome rumor round-up chart for the rumored upcoming third generation iPhone (full-size here). The new iPhone will likely be revealed at WWDC or a special Apple event. Which of these features do you see becoming a reality, come the official unveiling? Link
Read More »Wrench Ring for the Fashionable Mechanic
As far as manly jewelry goes, you don’t see many candidates. People try, they really do. But most of the results are unisex at best. This 12-point Wrench Ring oozes of testosterone, down to its silver finish. It’s not quiet clear whether you can use the ring for anything manly, like repairing your muscle car or cleaning out your sink’s ...
Read More »iPhone “Slide to Unlock” Panties are Geekily Raunch
This is the geeky stuff wet dreams are made of. The “Slide to Unlock” iPhone panties are the extremely sexy answer for the clueless nerd. Even if you’ve never had a previous sexual experience (probably about 90% of our audience), the handy iPhone guide will ease them into sexual knowledge. Each pair is $12 and worth every single penny. Check ...
Read More »Game Boy Camera Revived On The iPhone
Remember the Game Boy Camera? I do very vividly. You could buy an optional printer and print out all these wacky photos that looked like absolute shit. It also had some mini-games and a sequencer for making beats if I recall correctly. Now the camera that made everyone nauseous is making a comeback on the iPhone. Developer Epicore has released ...
Read More »Spin and Play MP3 Player Wraps Up Like a Yo-Yo
The S.MP3 by French designer Nicolas Cinguion is an ultra-mobile portable media player, allowing its earbud’s cable to be wrapped inside of its own circular design. It looks sort of like a yo-yo, but sadly, doesn’t offer yo-yo functionality. When will they learn??! What men really want is an MP3/yo-yo hybrid, not some impostor disguised as one.
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