Duct Tape Roses Scream Class

Years ago, I met a girl at a party and offered to bring her back to my place for a drink. We had our way and soon developed a close relationship. The problem was, I had no money. Since being Internet famous is on the same level as a Philadelphia crack dealer, I was broke when Valentine’s Day came around. Luckily, I was able to scrounge up $4.89 and ran off to the hardware store. I immediately requested a roll of red duct tape and some ribbon.

I came home, crumpled up the tape, threw it in some saran wrap and tied it up. The girl came over, I presented and next thing I knew, she was walking out the door. If only I had shelled out the $15 on a real set of duct tape roses…

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