“Come on, how can you be crying? They’re pretty much made out of air! Grow up, pussy! So… how was your first day of Kindergarten?” I’ll feel so much better about beating my kids if I’m wearing these. Link [via]
Read More »Star Destroyer Wedding Cake
Probably already long-ago digested and shat out by wedding guests, this Star Destroyer Wedding Cake must have been the centerpiece of the party. And if it wasn’t, I would love to see what the hell could top this (other than wedding toppers). This bad boy took a combined 15 hours to create and fed 100 people. 100 people? Give this ...
Read More »Magic Wand Universal Remote Control
Who hasn’t fantasized about being a wizard? Harry Potter might have to constantly worry about the dark lord Voldemort leering over his shoulder, but my wizardly concerns are much more pedestrian, such as figuring out how to change the channel with my penis magic wand. Thanks to the Kymera Magic Wand Universal Remote, there is no need to go to ...
Read More »Trader Joe’s is Trying Too Hard
Look, you don’t need to try this hard to attract geeks. All you need is to invest in an electronics section, even if all you sell is PS1 games and a few calculators, it’s the thought that counts and us geeks realize that. This plagiarist activity isn’t going to win you any brownie points. Link
Read More »Newspaper Man Fights the Digital Power
Print is seemingly on its death bed. The last rattling breath is barely escaping the industry’s lungs, yet the investors and the journalists continue to hold on for dear life, now only grasping with one slippery and weak finger. But all of this doesn’t seem to phase Newpaper Man, designed by Mark Jenkins in what I imagine to be a ...
Read More »Paris Wrapped Around Your Finger
The Paris ring features the famous European skyline of the city of Paris, wrapped around your very own finger. Rose, white and yellow 18k gold icons of Paris sit upon a single shank and ring. Hipster bros are going to be all over this in a few weeks, which will totally eliminate any chance of being unique, so if you ...
Read More »“Nun”chuks
If only these actually existed… Link
Read More »Unicornasaurus Looks Like The Tooth Fairy of My Dreams
The tooth fairy is one elusive creature. While Santa Claus’s identity is well known, the Tooth Fairy remains anonymous and mysterious, sometimes taking the form of a mythical fairy, other times resembling a full-sized woman. In my dreams, the toothfairy looks something like this Unicornasaurus. Can’t you see this big guy sneaking into your room, tapping your pillow with his ...
Read More »Steampunk Lincoln is Not Impressed With Your Legislation
Steampunk animatron Abraham Lincoln is not amused. He just checked over some of your recent legislation and as you can see, he is not too happy. You will now feel the wrath of Steampunk Lincoln. Go, go jet power! Go, go ocular laser beams! If Steampunk Lincoln had a comic book, I’d be all over that shit. Link
Read More »If da Vinci Had Designed the Mac
If Leonardo da Vinci had taken a page out of Steve Jobs’s book and decided to design computer hardware for a living, his designs would have probably looked something like this. We’ve already seen what the iPhone would have looked like through da Vinci’s eyes, and even his rendition of Super Mario Bros., but the iSteam Mac design reveals da ...
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